Relatives in India are like appendix, existing from long without any use but wait a second, even appendix is better than relatives because appendix doesn't irritates you and perform some work also. As a kid, I used to think that relatives are very helpful, loving, caring, family but as I grew up, I realized that relatives are useless, irritating and bunch of backstabbers.
So here are the 10 most irritating things about relatives-
1.Jealousy- If you are growing, if you are happy, if you are satisfied then remember my friend that someone sitting far from you is smelling like something being roasted without butter and ghee. I mean why? If someone has worked hard to make his living standards high then why the hell you are being jealous? It's totally meaningless. It's just like walking through a stable and feeling jealous by saying "Huh, being used as a milk producing machine and look how satisfied she looks, I am better than her because I don't reverse my digestive system to bring the food from my stomach to mouth again and start chewing"
2.Comparison- "Mama ke ladke ko dekha hai, ek saal kota me padh ke PMT clear kar liya aur ek tu hai" Ok, I got it you mean to say that everybody in the India should become LED(Lawyer, Engineer, Doctor), then from where will you listen the songs? who will play cricket? who will direct a film? who will be the next angry young man? Will you go to the doctor and say " Checkup to ho gya sir, ek item no. suna dete to maja aa jata" This is a humble request to all the relatives of India that please broaden your vision and try to look at the millions of opportunity in the market.
3. Gossiping Negativity - Share one happy moment of your life with your relatives and it will get blocked and will not go forwards but when you share a bad new, it will go viral without ant SOCIAL MEDIA MARKETING CAMPAIGN. The glee on their faces is out of the world. They will sit together, will come closer and will whisper "Are pata hai, Vinod ki biwi Jhumritalaiya me 4 golgappe kha ke bas 2 ke paise diye" "Haaye allah, tabhi mai sochu is aurat ke kadam hi asubh hai, ghar me pair rakhte hi, mausi ji ke batata vada se batata gir gya"
4. Invitation- This is one of the most irritating things in relatives. An invitation in India by relatives is not just an invitation, it's an strategically calculated and planned idea to check the intent of someone. If an invitation comes to your house, all the record book from the dark dungeon will be brought for analysis and everybody will check that whether his grandfather came in my grandfather’s marriage or not. I think they should also check whether the ancestors of their family helped in killing the dinosaur for dinner or not.
5. Guest- They come, stay, make you go insane and suck every single drop of blood and then go by giving a 10 bucks and saying “Kuch mithaai kha lena”. In India, guest is like god, hey, wait a second it means that from so many years I was praying to god to kick god (guest) out of my house as soon as possible, shit this is insane.
6. Help- Help is what they always want and in return they give you middle finger salute. As long as you keep helping them, you will be the best person on earth for them but just one single no and they will start sharpening their knife to stab you till your last drop of blood.
7. History record- All the relatives have a very detailed list of the things you did with them and they will keep on picking up those lines whenever necessary to show you down. They even remember the date and time when you disagreed for the extra salt in bhajiya which was very much hurting and humiliating for them.
8. Fake Love- If they are happy with you, the love which they will show will be out of the world. You will fill like the luckiest person in this universe just because of such nice relatives but remember that behind that fake love, there is an evil smile which is ready to devour your whole life.
9. Follow- You bought a fridge, they will buy it on the next day, you bought a microwave, they will buy it on the next day, your bike’s accelerator will not work, they will break their accelerator on the next day. Who says that the XYZ celebrity is the most followed up person in a particular year?
10.Will mislead your child- Yes this is also true, they are best at it and they know children can be easily motivated about something and they use them as their best weapon.
